Atheists are far outnumbered, and this makes dating other atheists a hard task at best. So often atheists try to find non practicing or moderate Christians to date, and sometimes they just wind up falling in love. Like two different cultures, this can be hectic, straining, and sometimes quite impossible. Especially when you hit the triggers, and the debates come on. Many people can’t survive the grand Canyon that comes between the two points of view.
Many theists have a narrow scope of vision about atheists. The tend to think that we are just as religious about our lack of belief as they are about their belief. This couldn’t be farther from the truth, though it is a rehearsed and reverberated lie sold to the masses at length. Most atheists have left the dogmatic thinking of resolved divine answers without questions, to question everything. Including why they believe anything and everything that they do. Some atheists have just abandoned the faith and see no reason to believe. This doesn’t qualify as religion, but religion does, and explaining to someone who refuses to see how you are different, why you are different can be nearly impossible. Spending time defending your lack of belief over and over can be daunting for even the best of us.
Dogmatism: This word should scare atheists. The dogmatic mind seeks to co-opt other minds. Convinced that there is dogmatism in us all, and that we are controlled by some grand designer, whether by permission, or circumstance. These kind of people want to put us under the control of religion, siting every possible flaw in our life as the need to return to mindlessly following along the religious spectrum. They can be different types of dangerous to atheists trying to date. The free willed dogmatist, the religious zealot in hiding, and the self sacrificing dogmatist who thinks that through sex and manipulation they can herd you back into the flock, and god will see the value of their sexual and physical sacrifice. Each of the perverts the nature of a relationship, and when children get involved, can destroy many lives.
It is hard for many reasons, to be an atheist who is dating. Mostly because we are seen as unfeeling, monsters who care nothing for morality. The biggest offense though is saying we are closed minded because we refuse to acknowledge how there could be a grand designer out there just waiting to save us from ourselves.
The problem is that from each side, the other looks a bit crazy. We can’t help it. One side sees the delusion of the religious and the religious live happy and content with their delusion. Even at the expense of life, and harm, and untold suffering. One side is always curious about the other, and more is they can’t see it from the other person’s perspective. So it makes for hard times. Even if the religious person is willing to understand, unless they leave the dogma, they can never really stop themselves from trying hard to implant the virus. (Unless they are Jews)
The ontological argument fails. The argument for design fails, the argument of god can’t be known fails. It all fails. This leaves religious people with only fear and anger. At first it can be dismissed because of the biological chemicals that are being produced, but ultimately there will be a high cost to both parties. It is sad to see how people will defend their virus, even using kids as a shield, or worse, purposely indoctrinating them against free thinking.
There can be few who stand the test. Mostly because there will never be evidence to prove a creator, nor to deny one. But the burden of proof falls to those who fail to look for it, and thus the fight continues. We watch as, like dominos, love falls apart at the hands of those who can’t reconcile the god/no god battle.
Atheists don’t stand on the same ground as theists, as we are well aware. We are hated, cursed, discriminated against, murdered, and pushed out of the very core of society. We are in essence the thinking outlaws, spreading a cure amongst people that is unwanted by the masses. We scare them, and panic them, plague them with worries. We are the ones who drive them from their safe hiding placed deep within the dreams of their delusions, and for that we pay a sore price.
But we are the ones who can see real morality, living without dogma, and with freedom from fear based on a pre determined destiny. We struggle to get by, and give no thanks nor plead help from a divine source. We give thanks to our fellow man, and help others without thought for reward, and hope for paradise. We are just simple people.
When it comes to dating though, we cross lines that can be hard, if not devastating to cross. Mostly because the desire to be loved and cared for is there, maybe more so, because we are smart. Smart people often face a harder time with love, because it is hard to be accepted when you can point out all the flaws in people and the logic you seek so hard. It can be hard because you might not have been exposed to all the in’s and out of social life, and the social norms. Atheists have some of the hardest lives, because they strive to be more than just mindless people following, but they happen to be some of our greatest minds. Yet it simply doesn’t fare well when it comes to matters of the heart, and the loving, and living.